wishlist # 2 : sunset

...after a while she felt what she was missing the most...

it was the sea

and

the sunset

maybe more the sunset itself

than the sea

or both the sunset with the sea

and all the colors it brought to the sea

and its immense capacity of taking away the thoughts...

.....then all of a sudden

she remained amazed.....

thats when he asked:

- where are you looking at so enchanted?

-i'm looking at the horizon..

-oh yes? whats there? 

-can't you see? 

-well, i see the sea and the sunset...

with her eyes still on the horizon

she said: 

-its my heart there ..settled down on the sea...its the first time i see 

my heart-set...

thats why i'm so enchanted...

wishlist # 1: a cup of dream

...she entered the cafè in a rush..

while the snow crystals on her hair were melting in silence,

she found herself sitting at the table next to the window..

glanced at the snow outside and thought: it  is almost new year..

as the waiter came next to her,

she was already wandering around her wishes..

interrupted by the words of the waiter:

' what can i serve you miss? '

she answered all dazzled :

' may i have a cup of dream, please? '

the waiter - with a hint of a smile on his lips - asked:

' sure miss, how would you like your dream, with or without milk? '

' oh! with milk please...and sugar...a spoonful of sugar...'

while the waiter was leaving ,

she heard him whistling:

one more cup of dream for the road...

one more  cup of dream 'fore you go

to the valley below..

Sometimes she stayed at home. She had the capacity for being by herself for hours, apparently doing nothing.

Then one night she woke again, roused by some movement of his.
'What's the matter now, George? ' she asked, exasperated.

In the silence that followed, the resurrected boy in George died painfully.

'Nothing,' he said, 'nothing at all.' He turned away from her, defeated.

It was he who moved out of the big bed into the narrow bed in the study. She said with a sharp sad smile:

'Fed up with me, George? Well, I can't help it, you know. I didn't ever like sleeping beside someone very much.'

........

In the morning she looked at him oddly, with an odd sad little respect, and said:

'You know what, George, you've just got into the habit of loving.'

........


very refined quotes and the title from  doris lessing' s 'the habit of  loving'
combined with the lino-cut drawings of serkan adin

başlangıç / inception

phrase : 'raif efendi' 

striker: 'sabahattin ali'

photo: emil kozak 

soul: my very own

* my soul was as peaceful as a sea without wind and wrinkle. 

..and its so hard to hate when there's so much to love.

who is the wildest

us or them?

drawings for the wildest animal
by Wilde Dieren

today

so you'll glow
also tomorrow.
as golden as you are.

just as i do.

"Verweile doch, du bist so schön! "

"Çok güzelsin, gitme dur"




So I didn't kiss you like I should
Didn't grace you like I meant.
Never once did I lay my eyes on you
And all along you saw me cry.


a dedication to my beloved city istanbul.


* title by Goethe's Faust
* translation by Haldun Taner
* lyrics by Lykke Li
* photo by me.

'that's why'

"...Do you think the baby kangaroo is still alive? ' she asked me in the train.
'I'm sure it is. There wasn't any article about it dying. If it had died, I'm sure we would have read about it.'
'Maybe it's not dead, but sick and in some hospital.'
'Well, I think there would have been an article about that, too.'
'But what if it had a nervous breakdown and is hiding off in a corner?'
'A baby having a breakdown?'
'Not the baby. The mother! Maybe it suffered some sort of trauma and is holed up with the baby in a dark back room.'
Women really think of every possible scenario, I thought, impressed. A trauma? What kind of trauma could affect a kangaroo?
'If I dont see the baby kangaroo now I dont think I'll have another chance to. Ever,' she said.
'I suppose not.'
'I mean, have you ever seen one?'
'Nope, not me,' I said.
'Are you so sure you'll ever have another chance to?'
'I dont know.'
'Thats why i'm worried.'
'Yeah, but look,' I shot back, 'I've never seen a giraffe give birth, or even whales swimming, so why make such a big deal about a baby kangaroo?'
'Because it's a baby kangaroo,' she said.

'That's why.'

I gave up and started leafing through the newspaper.
I'd never once won an argument with a girl. ...."


Quoted from the short story 'A perfect day for Kangaroos' by Haruki Murakami.

Combined with the photo taken by me in Paris a while ago.

Just because.

here comes the spring's cat*

it was one of those march days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold:
when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.

Charles Dickens

*watercolour drawing by me. all rights reserved.

Copie conforme / certified copies

gabriel vormstein

just cant get enough of...

....pleasure, loneliness, thoughts, dreams, before, after, accepting, refusing, now and then....

amazingly realistic oil paints by Lee Price.